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[09 Oct 2004|03:59pm] |
NEW JOURNAL
www.livejournal.com/~prettywasted
That's where I shall be from now on
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| %$(%*$(#@#$(%*@@)($ |
[08 Oct 2004|10:23pm] |
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mood |
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 angry |
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Goddammit. I lost my wallet =( It had over 60 bucks in it and my bank card and plus I really loved that wallet and I bought it in the states on vk.
I figure it must of fallen out of my bookbag walking downtown after school.
Fuuuuuuuuck.
I'm cursed, I know it.
So anyway, this weekend I'll be doing a lot of nothing, it's a lazy weekend I suppose. Yep.
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[07 Oct 2004|03:21pm] |
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mood |
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 okay |
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so everybody was being a bitch to me today.
jp got pissed for unknown reasons, just another one of his fits i suppose. blake was talkin shit to me to jp, since j was mad at me i guess blake thought it'd be cool to follow along. cerea today went along with j also and ignored me and hung out with him.
great friends, eh?
also got school pics today, wonder how bad this years will turn out.
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| I'm following Usher's lead |
[04 Oct 2004|02:30pm] |
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mood |
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I'mReallyOk.ErinMadeMeHappier! |
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and confessing. Dude, people better not read this =P I'm just confessing to my journal.
*I am VERY physically attracted to Tyler B. I've always had a fantasy of having wild and crazy sex with him. Even though I beat him up and I hate him.
*I have cut my mother.
*I have a hidden file on fotki that has pictures of guys AND girls I think are hot.
*I am honestly jealous of Kayte.(not her but how she's like bff with joce now)
*I am bisexual.
*I can STAND listening to Avril Lavigne.(no I don't like her but I can stand her)
*I don't love Patrick.
*I steal my mom's money and beer.
*I love to fight.
*I don't like Blake that much but I tell him he's my best friend(besides joce)
*I've DRAWN out ways I want to kill/torture my enemies.
*I was going to commit suicide and I tried to get the razor apart but after awhile I got bored and sat it down and went to watch tv.
*I use people quite often.
*I lie a lot.
Yea, those are some confessions. Hate meh.
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[03 Oct 2004|08:05pm] |
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mood |
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 sad |
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music |
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Oh Serena - The Distillers |
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Ok so today I went to the camp with nannie, bumpie, dana, dianna, mom, dad, erin and mike and we had a supper thingy i geuss for me birthday and after being so sad all weekend erin cheered me up so well. god i love her so much and diana and dana said i can babysit her soon and i fed her today and stuff and i got so happy.
then i came home and got talking to jocelynn and i told how ive been sad we've been drifting apart and i tried to explain it..kinda.. but she didn't understand. but now she said she'll spend the whole halloween weekend with me but she's doing something every other weekend of this month. I.E. QUINCIE, CEREA, KAYTE. ya that's why i feel left out, she chose them over me but if i told her that she'd think im jealous. im not jealous i was just shocked that she picked those 3 over me, you know?
and im crying again now because i keep thinking about how things used to be, god i wish i could turn back time. then again, who doesnt? The old times, me and jocelynn we're inseperable and me and patrick we're as happy as can be. now everythings fucked up.
everything good comes to an end i suppose. i wonder if i'll go through another happy phase and in a couple years time look back and cry over that to? lifes fucked man. i hate it. i mean what's the point of going through this if your just gonna die anyways?
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[03 Oct 2004|09:45am] |
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mood |
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depressed |
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music |
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The Distillers |
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The 2 people in the world that my life revolved around, the 2 people that I would die for..don't even care about me any more.
I'd give anything and everything I own if I could just go back to when I was happy, when he loved me so much, when he cried for me, when he said he wanted to run away with me, and the times that me and Jocelynn were bestfriends, the times I felt wanted and everybody was happy. Now I'm stuck with nothing.
What is there do to now?
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[02 Oct 2004|05:48pm] |
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mood |
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depressed |
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music |
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Bad Religion |
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ugh I'm not going to write in here saying how much I miss patrick.
I'm not. I'm not. I'm not.
goddammit so I'm writing for nothing.
LIFE SUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCKS.
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[02 Oct 2004|12:44pm] |
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mood |
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depressed |
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music |
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Switchfoot |
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I want to die. I have nothing to live for anyway.
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[01 Oct 2004|08:33pm] |
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mood |
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sad |
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music |
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The Beach Boys |
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I'm punishing myself, I'm not going to eat for atleast 3 days. I'm punishing myself for those times I said I hated Patrick, those times I broke up with him and even made him cry once, For the times I took him for granted.. I'm punishing myself. That's not the only way I'm gonna do it but it's the only way I'm gonna do it for now.
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[01 Oct 2004|05:38pm] |
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mood |
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so so sad |
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I don't know what I'm going to do. Fuck.
Right after I was done writing in here last entry nannie came and wanted me to go out for supper. Well I was holding back tears the whole way and on the way back it didn't help that the radio was playing classic love songs.
I can't live like this, I love him too much... I'm so confused, I don't understand.
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